"Notice the simplicity of truth and the limitations that complexity places on your ability to see what is of value" -Diana Cooper
How do I explain my hesitation for scaling my business? Most of us want to grow right? But I haven't - I've been avoiding it. Sure, I had a vision, but for the past 6 months it's all felt so complicated. I don't do complicated. I avoid complications.
So I fell into a void.
A place where all action felt wrong and forced and...well, just wrong.
I fought the void.
I brought flood lights to light the path.
I laid out my machete.
I got ready for battle.
And sometimes I'd get glimpses of the light but mostly I sat in the dark waiting.
It's not my superpower.
What I learned was a new level of surrender, and somewhere in that surrender my vision changed. I was trying to force the vision that made sense on the path I had been blazing. But that wasn't really IT.
See the piece I missed was that nothing I expected turned into what is really meant to be happening. There were things put into motion that I had no idea about. Things that, once I surrendered, suddenly appeared. Doors that I hadn't anticipated opened. Doors I had been trying to unlock disappeared completely. And other doors got a new paint job.
The most interesting piece though was that my idea of bigger and better being complicated also fell away.
Once I allowed myself to see where the path was going (instead of forcing the jungle to conform to me), it became exceedingly simple. To bring on a new team of awesomeness to do even more for me than I've ever dreamed of became the next easiest thing to do.
I had to learn to expand my business in a way that feels like it's in alignment with ME - I had to go small to go big.
The void allowed those things I was cooking to fully marinate.
So I'm allowing the simplicity of my next level of business to come forward. I'm marveling in the miracles that are being presented to me. And I'm rolling around in the possibilities that in my heart feel new and foreign yet comforting and familiar at the same time... a coming home to me.
So I'll leave you with this today>>>
If it feels complicated, you're missing the point.
You're not seeing what's really of value.
The truth is in the simpleness, is in the clarity, is in the ease.
It's in the surrender to what IS so that what can be can BE.
I remember when I first landed on 'Screw the Formulas' as my tagline. I was helping my clients do things in untraditional ways, to build their businesses counter to what everyone else was teaching them. They came to me with things like 'I need to write more because I should have a blog to get more business' and 'I know I have to go to these networking groups but I hate them' and so on... beating themselves up for not doing the things they were told to do and struggling in their businesses because of it.
So 'Screw the Formulas' was an easy outtake of the permission I gave every day to be more intuitive with business creation.
And I thought I did it too.
But truly, I kept seeing places where I was not in alignment with my own message. I would automatically do things that I were practically ingrained in my system, things I was taught to do that seemed smart but never really fit me.
How can I teach people to screw the formulas if I hadn't fully released myself from them first? SO I learned. I did the work. Every decision, every comma, every thought, well, I had to up my game to make sure that I set all of that against the tagline and asked 'where am I following a formula here'?
DON'T YELL IT - BE IT
The trick to being a successful coach is to be willing to work your ass off on the internal workings of who you ARE and to have your business reflect who you BE not who you tell others to be.
Until I was wiling to do that for myself, it was out of integrity to bring that to other people.
Listen, anyone can sit there and tell you how to do things or how to be 'better' but I ask you - are they living and breathing it themselves first? My clients know that I am walking my talk and that is what gives THEM permission to do it for themselves in turn. Lead by example is the most beautiful way to walk the path with our clients.
THAT'S MASTERY AT A WHOLE NEW LEVEL
The "rules" of business as we are taught are FINITE
The "rules" of the Universe undeniably are INFINITE
Which is exactly why it is impossible to put the infinite into a nice neat little box and say 'here is our business'.
It's why so many coaches suffer and fail... because they are operating within the finite where they don't vibrationally align. They tap into their juicy intuition in the coaching conversation but business 'should' be operated from the head so they leap from one to the other instead of engaging the infinite in all things.
So right now, throw out all the formulas you've been taught. Eliminate the shoulds and smart strategies and even the way business is supposed to look.
It doesn't apply to you.
Let it go.
I grant my fellow intuitives & empaths a golden ticket of permission to tap IN. Build your business from your heart space. What feels really right? What does that illogical inner voice tell you to do or to be today? Throw out your packages and your 5 steps to selling more anything and relax. What ONE thing do you feel most compelled to do? Create your own systems and containers with your energy. Build the ones that have your unique spiritual signature. Infuse your business with soul.
We were never meant to be finite because we ARE infinite.
There are no 7 steps to awesomeness.
There are a million tiny infinitesimal adjustments and microscopic ways of being more that go into real success.
Perhaps they can be condensed into a few big leaps in hindsight, but in advance? No.
There is no way one person can predict all the millions of things that need to fall into place... so don't believe it when people give you a formula to follow.
Put them into the file that says 'mythical creatures in the form of a list... unpack at your own risk' and continue growing one step at a time.
I don't make it through many self-development books. I read very little of other people's advice - yes it triggers my maverick 'don't tell me what to do' thing but there's a mirror there too.
See there's this part in the beginning of the books where the author spends time telling me all about the problem they are going to solve and proving why they are uniquely qualified to teach the solution to the world. And it bores the snot out of me and turns me off and it's predictable and makes me feel less-than.
This particular formula is like a weed in my life... find the problem, prove why THIS person is the one to deliver salvation and then finally give more proof about why it's the way.
Ideal client? What's their problem and then speak to that
Book? What problem are you going to eradicate with it
Public Speaking? What's wrong with the people in the room and tease them with a solution
Coaching? What's your problem....
When I was in high school I was captain of my Mock Trial team and the Debate team. I went into college hell bent on being a International Lawyer to fix the wrongs in the world. My husband and I didn't date for 3 years because we got into a political debate on the ride home from us being set up. I'm also a Virgo (gotta add that little piece)
Being right became who I was.
I can see the problems all around me and of course, I am an expert at solving them all. I am clever and intuitive and gosh-darn-it I KNOW the path.
It got me pretty far.
I also saw how damaging that is for others around me and for myself because I can see what happens to me internally when others tell me those same things.
What was I trying to prove by being right? How exhausting is it to always know the proper path? What was I pushing away by being the fixer?
I look at my book in wonderment because it took a good portion of my lifetime to finally release the pressure to prove that this stuff I was writing was awesome because quite frankly, I never felt that my material would solve any problem.
And if it didn't solve a problem then it was clearly not valuable.
I don't need anyone to fix ME... and somewhere along the way, I started understanding that I'm not here to fix anyone else either. Funny how that is a longer lesson to learn lol.
See when I play in the vibration of solving problems I am not advocating the expansion but reinforcing the contraction.
WHAT I FOCUS ON GROWS
Leading with problems and offering solutions is backwards.
Being an incredibly awesome problem solver was simply a way of proving something to myself and the world.
Is that true service?
Is it loving and kind to point out everyone else's issues and then say 'work with me' or 'read my book' because it will solve it for you because I KNOW THE WAY...?
That's what I had learned - to find the pain points and offer a way out.
That sells stuff all the time so obviously that's where to come from in my business right?
I started asking myself different questions and coming at my business from a different angle.
What if I approach people and business creation from a more loving place?
What if I see the pain and imperfections as beautiful and right and in fact not even address them at all?
What if I spend less time seeing what's wrong and more time concentrating ONLY on the magic and magnificent sentient beings we already are?
If I'm not proving anything or fixing anyone there's just so much more space to breathe in. So much more space to give permission for people to love and trust who they truly are.
The hardest part of writing my book was making sure that I was never telling others what to do...
WHAT I FOCUS ON GROWS
Focus on the magic already within, not the problems or blocks or whatevers holding us back and suddenly instead of growing the weeds, we grow the good stuff.
Lead with the wonderment and questioning and awe rather than the super smart solutions and the need to prove my awesomeness.
Release my need to share my perfect solution to others' perceived issues in all my interactions - from what I write to what I do.
What if I actually know nothing?
Speak only for myself and what I know. Live and be my message rather than preach from it.
I am an expert ONLY at being me.
Nothing to fix.
No problems to solve.
Nothing to prove.