What's your BRAND and who gives a shit?
I'm not Target or CocaCola or a car. I'm a living breathing human. I don't worry about labeling myself as one thing or another. When I'm inspired, I speak. When I'm moved, I let people know.
Because I'm not a BRAND.
and have no interest in being one.
Perhaps it's my maverick who refuses to pigeon hole myself into type. But what if just for a moment we stopped trying to impress anyone or tighten up our messaging, or have it all be perfectly, expertly categorized so others will understand and accept us?
Would we call who we are a brand? Would you be cheering on your kids in their sports on the sidelines wondering how this incorporates into your brand? How about in bed with your partner... is that your brand? Or do we think that our brand is some facade we put on, a costume to wear between the hours of 9-5 monday - friday?
What happens when we focus on being a BRAND is we become hidden behind the curtain of our description, just like the wizard behind the curtain.
So yeah, I don't really give a shit about having a brand. I am me. Are you willing to be more of who you are, to release the pressure to be something other than that...
There was this moment when I looked around my business and knew things needed to change... and that it wasn't the stuff I was doing that was the issue. I was taking all the "right" steps, I had all the "right" marketing and copy and website and followers on all the social platforms - but I still felt like I was missing SOMETHING, some it-factor kind of thing that obviously other coaches had the I didn't. So I searched for answers.
I bought programs promising answers and easy steps and the latest and greatest way to turn my struggling coaching practice into an instant success. I paid coaches who claimed to have the answers. In essence, I was trying to buy myself a quantum leap.
What was I missing?
Quite simply, I was missing ME. I got so wrapped up in hoping someone else could tell me what I was missing that I forgot to ask myself the question.
I had to learn to TRUST MYSELF. It was the hardest thing I've ever learned. I am fortunate to have found the right coaches who helped me lean more and more into that scary territory. I am grateful to have found the right friends who support and encourage that in me.
See we all have our own answers if we take the time and have the guidance to find them. I've helped hundreds of people find that spark of genius inside of themselves. If there is one thing that I want for each person who works with me, it's to be able to walk away really trusting that their answers are inside of them.
That was my journey... my QUANTUM LEAP was an internal one, and yes, the external world stepped up to match it.
And now I'm calling in those perfect clients for 2 spots in my roster to:
Show up fully
Laugh at themselves
Deepen their intuition
Be vulnerable and honest and open
Take actions that feel really right for them
Love learning and expanding their minds, heart and souls
Create transformation in others and themselves
Cry, laugh and occasionally swear
Lead with their hearts (even if sometimes blocked by their brains)
Know that our work is priceless and value it accordingly
Believe that insight can happen in an instant and will be fully 'in the room' so they don't miss it
Want to create their own Quantum Leaps, in their inner and outer worlds and kick ass in their business
Understand this… I don't offer coaching spots to just anyone, there is no buy now button. There is a screening process we both must go through. I'm not anxious to fill ANY spot - it has to be for the RIGHT person... the one who really connects with me at a heart level. Perhaps you're that person if you're reading this now and your stomach is making little flutters and your heart feels like it will jump out of their chest or you've got goose bumps or tears.
I'm not looking for magic pill seekers - go join B-School or one of the thousands of courses that promise 6 figures overnight. Come back when those formulas don't feel right.
I'm looking for people who want to succeed from a place of power and authenticity. For people who are interested in self growth as a vehicle to make an impact on each life they touch.
I'm looking for people who want to grow their skill sets and reach new levels of mastery in their lives.
I'm looking for people who want to build a business that doesn't involve social media posting, perfect tag lines, stupid sales pitches, get rich by doing x-y-z or 'getting out there in a big way' (whatever that means) but for those who want to build something built on relationships and open hearted awesomeness.
I'm looking for people who want to hold hands with others like them and lift each other up to new levels of success.
If that's you, message me and we'll set up a time to connect heart emoticon
If you're craving community, build it.
If you're wanting a revolution, start it.
If you're desiring transformation, transform.
If you're waiting for proof that it works before you do these things, stop.
It might work. It might not.
AND It will fail 100% of the time if you don't do anything.
Welcome to the club. We silent ones, the ones who are least likely to speak up and speak out. The ones with incredibly profound dialogue happening inside our own heads. The ones who aren't out shouting about our businesses or storming the castles to build our community.
We know we need to get out more...
But we (not-so-secretly) don't want to.
I remember when I married my husband I was so struck by my new in-laws and their group of friends. They'd lived in the same area for 30 years and had an amazing circle of friends. Those friends were so close to my in-laws they even threw ME my bridal shower. I thought to myself then that I wished to have that in my life - a community that I was deeply immeshed in, with people to back me up over the years.
So when we moved to our current town I decided to make a change. Shy & Introverted was no longer an obstacle because dammit, I would have that sphere of influence in my life just like the Nelsons. So I joined a Mommy & Me class, and on the first day the teacher announced that she was moving and needed a new teacher. I raised my hand. I had no idea how to run the class (having never even been to one before) but I knew that I NEEDED this group to continue if I wanted that community. Internally instead of dread, I actually felt calm... because as the teacher, I would know my role. I wouldn't be forced to make small talk with others, I would have a JOB (kinda like being at a party and helping with the dishes right?). People would come up to me and talk instead of me trying to sit in on conversations others were having and weave myself into those who clearly knew how to small talk.
SO I PLAYED THE ROLE OF A LEADER.
From that day forward, I became a Board Member, a President, a Founder, a Leader, or the person who got to drive the golf cart and have a walkie-talkie at any and all groups I joined or formed.
Not that I didn't swear in the car the whole way to each and every meeting, hating that I was forcing myself to go....
For me, building my community became about taking on roles where I knew the rules of engagement and others would start conversations with ME rather than me seeking out them. In many ways, my introversion worked as a huge advantage in leadership - because I had the patience and I could see bigger pictures than the extroverts working the room.
Fast forward to today and I lead one of the largest coaching communities on Facebook. I show up here in Evercoach as an Ambassador. I'm launching a new community in the next month or so for charitable purposes. I publish a magazine with amazing coaches from around the world read around 100k times. I've had an email community for going on 11 years now (some people have been on it since day 1).
AND I'M STILL AN INTROVERT.
I know I cannot build a business without paying attention to building a community. As much as it sucks, there is no way I would be able to create clients without having some contact with actual people. So to you introverts in the room, the ones who may not even think they want to write their response in public I implore you to start thinking of community as a priority. It can be small and intimate. It can look like anything you want it to look like... but INTROVERSION ISN'T AN EXCUSE TO NOT BUILD IT.
What kind of people would you be willing to hang out with seriously for a year? What can you build or join? What role can you take on?
Community is everything... what will you do to build one for yourself?
We were talking about this with one of my groups today and felt it powerful to share. It might trigger people... that's totally okay.
When I started with my last Spiritual Coach she said to me, we have one theme in our work together, and you're going to come kicking and screaming through this, but it's the one thing that has governed your life for lifetimes. That one thing is CONTROL. She said (lovingly) "You feel that you know better than God does in what your life should look like, so you try to control the very forces of the Universe. You imagine that you can decide when it's okay that Source knows best and when you know more. You assume that Spirit knows best except when you know better. When you don't feel that control, you justify it internally to say that you actually do."
She taught me that we do have choice in everything we do, in what we believe and in what feels true, but we do not truly have control over anything.
It was like 'now I'm going to meditate and I'm going to control how long I do it and what it looks like and in that moment it's okay to surrender'. It's like saying 'Hey Universe! I am in control - not you! I will tell you exactly what I want and then it's your job to deliver it to me." And honestly, that's kind of bullshit. I can choose what I ask for but I can't control how it's delivered. It's a big f-u to the Universe when I tell it I control it, because I know best.
No matter what I say or think, I'm pretty sure that I don't control the Divine.
I cannot control the world around me. The only thing I can do is accept that everything in my life is a choice. I try to control Spirit, to control Abundance. to control Security, to control my life and those around me, to control my flow. It doesn't work.
But when I see where I am working so hard to control things that are NOT mine to control, I can release all this energy I've been holding onto. See, I am not in control of anything other than the choices I make.
I can choose my thoughts and my thoughts create my reality.
There's such a HUGE difference between CONTROL and CHOICE.
Am I willing to question myself... is this me controlling the process or is this me showing up and making choices that support me? And can I allow others the same freedom of choice without the control?
What can I choose?
Where can I release my feeble attempts at control?
The more I dove into those questions the more miracles started to occur. The more I became a creator in my life instead of forcing and pushing and holding onto unrealistic expectations.
Listen, I'm not perfect - I still have control issues.
AND I keep taking my mind out of my decisions. I keep reminding myself that each moment is filled with choice. And choice gives me a place where truly I reign supreme... since clearly there's nothing else I am ever able to rule over.